Satin Laced Fantasies.

Camping.

2008-06-17T21:50:55Z

Title: Camping
Rating: NC-17
Pairing:Brendon Urie/ Ryan Ross
Disclaimer: Hey guess what?? This isn't real! It didn't happen.

"I'm really sorry you guys! I would come with you but I promised Ashlee we would go out tonight like a week ago and I can't cancel. We've both been so busy we've hardly seen each other," Brendon huffed and raised his eyebrows. Ryan glared at him,

"It's ok Pete we understand."

"Your loss," remarked Brendon as he carried his bag out towards Ryan's car. Ryan rolled his eyes, grabbed his own bag and followed. They flung their bags in the back and turned to say bye to Pete. It was a cool day in Chicago, the gentle wind tousled Ryan's hair and sent dead leaves dancing around the pair's feet.

"Have fun though! And take care yeah?" Pete smiled as Brendon clambered into the car and Ryan sighed again before ducking into the driver's seat. Pete watched as Brendon fidgeted and Ryan rolled his eyes some more waiting for his passenger to do up his seat belt before pulling off the driveway. He waved as Brendon leaned across for the horn and Ryan slapped his hands away and they disappeared round the corner of the street. They were staying with him for a couple of days while they were in town. It wasn't like they couldn't afford a hotel but Pete had insisted, it'll be fun! They had organised a little camping trip, Ryan, Brendon, their band-mates Spencer and Jon as well as Joe Trohman and Andy Hurley. Pete was spending the evening with the wife, much to Brendon's disgust, and Patrick Stump was busy producing an album for an up and coming artist he had befriended somewhere.

"I feel so replaced," moaned Brendon as they drove away from the house.

"Brendon, you're not his girlfriend, you never were and you never will be. He's was never gunna spend the rest of his life messing about with us lot like a teenager."

"Well he should! Look at us, this is fun right? We're happy! We're just not good enough anymore," Ryan glanced across at Brendon's pouty, sulking face and laughed.

"Oh get over yourself! Stop sulking and put some music on!" Brendon wound down his window, put on his sunglasses and switched on the radio. The sulking was quickly forgotten and replaced by him singing at the top of his voice to whatever happened to come on."Brendon! Stop flicking! Why can't you listen to a whole song?" Brendon giggled as he carried on flicking and Ryan tried not to be distracted by his operatic performance to accompany every song he liked. It was early evening and it was starting to get colder as they drove away from Chicago and out into the middle of nowhere. They had done this before, a couple of times, and it had always been eventful. The first time they had ventured out it had poured with rain all night long and they had huddled together in their tents, nobody willing to suggest going home for fear of looking like they were afraid. The second adventure had ended with Brendon stealing Patrick's glasses and running away leaving him blind and stumbling around. It was all quite amusing until Patrick tripped on a tree root and sprained his ankle and the whole party had to relocate to A & E.

"Brendon are you going to behave this time? I don't want to have to make apologies for you."

"Well it's nice to see you think so highly of me! We're going to have fun aren't we? Lighten up Ry!" Ryan was wearing a tight brown v-neck and old faded skinny jeans with his brown ankle boots. Brendon had put on the brightest blue t-shirt he owned and black jeans with some brightly coloured Nikes.

"You're not very well dressed for nature Bren... Have you ever heard of camouflage? A bear would spot you miles away."

"Bears? In Chicago? Ermm... I don't think so Ry. What's the matter with you? Stop harassing me! Come on! Spill! Somethings bothering you."

"I'm just tired...sorry..." Ryan kept his eyes fixed on the road but Brendon could see something wasn't right.

"Don't lie to me Ryan Ross! I won't stand for it!"

"It's nothing really... I just miss Keltie and I haven't been sleeping. I'm tired."

"Aww Ry, come on. We've been through this! You're better off without her. Dude we don't need girls, we've got each other! Look at Pete, you wanna be like that? Turning down the camping trip of a lifetime for some girl?"

"Not just some girl Brendon. I want love. I want the real thing."

"Oh no, here we go. You and the L word. Seriously Ry, you don't need that! I love you! Isn't that enough?" Brendon looked at Ryan, he still wasn't smiling. "Look I know you're not feeling your best but we're gunna have fun tonight. I'm going to force fun upon you. No mentions of the L word or girls or anything. Ok?" Ryan forced a half-hearted smile.

"Yeah. Thanks Bren, I'm sorry. I don't mean to be so pessimistic. We are gunna have fun," Brendon grinned triumphantly and turned the radio up so that the bass made the seats shake. Ryan couldn't help but laugh at Brendon's diva pose and dramatic performance. After about half an hour Brendon ran out of steam, his head lay back against the seat and his eyes were closed but he wasn't asleep. Ryan glanced at him, he looked so different when he was wasn't being a maniac, he looked vulnerable somehow. Like under the big front he was still just a boy, just the same as Ryan. He wondered what Brendon was thinking about, or if he was just trying to save some energy for what promised to be an eventful night. Ryan leaned forward to switch the radio over and adjust the volume to something a bit calmer.

"Bren...Hey, Bren we're here," Brendon's eyes sprung open proving he had never been asleep or even close. He sat upright and peered out the windows like an excited schoolboy on his first excursion. Ryan pulled into a dark and almost abandoned car park. Right in the middle were two cars, in the first Spencer Smith sat sideways in the driving seat, his door flung wide open. Jon Walker was perched on the bonnet carefully examining what appeared to be a leaf. Joe Trohman lay sprawled across the backseat of the second car and Andy Hurley sat in the driver's seat chatting to Spencer. They all, bar Joe, looked up as Ryan pulled in beside them and Brendon bounced out of the car.

"Hello happy campers!" Ryan stepped out and made a face at his friends that said here we go. Brendon peered through the car window at Joe, "Ermmm... what's he doing? This is no time for sleeping." He furrowed his brow intently and looked around for an answer.

"He's stoned," Andy replied with a mild tone of disapproval.

"Ahh, I see. JOE GET UP," He tapped on the window, Joe opened his eyes peered at Brendon and then closed them again. "Don't you dare ignore me Trohman!" Brendon opened the door, grabbed Joe's feet and tugged firmly.

"Ah fuck! Get off me! I'm coming ok!" Joe kicked his feet and squirmed away. Brendon spun round giggling and skipped off between the trees shouting,

"LET'S GET MOVING!"

"Oh I'll get the bags then shall I?" Ryan called after him.

"Is he ok?" asked Andy pulling his bag out of the car.

"I think Pete feeds him sugar when I'm not looking..." Ryan shook his head as he hauled their stuff from the back seat. “We’d better go find him before he gets lost,” and the five men followed the leafy path Brendon had disappeared down.

Just under an hour later Jon stood back, admiring his handy work.

 “So, who’s having which tent?” He turned round to look at the rest of the group. Ryan was sitting beside the campfire he had just started looking rather pleased with himself. Joe and Andy were arguing about who was the greatest metal band in the world at the moment. Spencer was clutching a bag of tent pegs and pretending to be helpful and Brendon had disappeared from sight. “Oh and thanks a bunch for the help guys,” Spencer smiled and muttered in reply,

 “No problem,” before turning to find the source of the loud rustling coming from the nearby bushes, “What the hell is that?” As though in response a blue back emerged from between the branches, Brendon was dragging a big log and looking very happy with himself. He let go of his prize and turned round to face his puzzled audience.

“It’s to sit on! There’s more! I’ll leave you guys with this one,” and then he rushed back between the leaves like a boy scout on a mission. Soon they had the four logs Brendon had found framing the fire and they sat around it chatting. Brendon perched next to Ryan on one side who was idly strumming his guitar, occasionally striking up a half-hearted sing along. Brendon chattered away about anything and everything. To their right sat Jon and Joe who were slyly sharing a bottle of whiskey which they occasionally passed on to Ryan, who refused to allow Brendon to have any.

 “Seriously no, you’re a hazard,” Brendon pouted jokingly but wasn’t honestly too bothered. He was happy chattering away. Spencer sat to their left scribbling in a little note book and singing along to Ryan’s strumming from time to time. Andy sat beside him curiously glancing at what he was writing and drawing him and asking him questions about the meaning of life and such. This provided Joe and Jon with much entertainment and their giggles were greeted with glares from Andy who chose to ignore their drinking.

 “Oh Ryan, play that song you played me the other day!” Brendon poked his arm,

 “What... get...off... what song?” Ryan asked pushing his hand away. 

“You knoooow. The pretty one. When we were in the garden the other day and I was eating pizza and I dropped it and Hemmy was like “whoosh”, in there like a shot stealing it and then...”
 
“OH. That one,” Ryan interrupted and began to play. Spencer looked up from his game of x-rated hangman with Andy curiously.

 “That’s really cool Ry, did you write that?” Ryan nodded slowly, trying not to lose his concentration. When he finished he looked up to see everyone staring at him, his face flushed crimson and he quickly put his guitar down behind him and turned to talk to Brendon. Anything to change the subject.

 “Fisting!” Andy shouted suddenly. Joe fell off his seat laughing,  

“Nobody told me it was confession time!” He snorted hysterically.

 “Hangman! We’re playing hangman!” Andy snapped at him but by this point he was unstoppable.

 “Yeah alright Hurley. Your secrets out now!” Jon couldn’t help but start to giggle as Joe rolled about on the floor and the rest of them struggled to hide the grins.

 “I think that’s enough of that game,” Andy announced and embraced Spencer in deep conversation once again. Ryan who had been watching the goings on turned back to Brendon to find him staring intently. He was a little startled by the intensity of Brendon’s stare. 

“Ermm... what?” He mumbled nervously. 

“That’s the first time I’ve seen you smile properly in ages. You know you look so pretty when you smile,” Ryan furrowed his brow, he was slightly puzzled by the comment but then it was Brendon, “Yeah... less so when you make that face.” They were interrupted by Jon cheering as Joe endeavoured to down the last of the whiskey. He succeeded in his challenge and held the empty bottle up triumphantly before attempting to stand up and stumbling towards the fire.  

“Woah! Ok Joe I think it’s time you went to bed don’t you?” Andy jumped up to grab him, “I’m getting kind of cold anyway, I’m taking you back.” Joe’s face had suddenly gone quite pale and he looked somewhat confused. "Right you guys don’t stay out here too late. It’s getting really cold and the mosquitoes will actually eat you alive,” he looked round at them one by one showing them he was serious. “Come on then. Let’s get you back,” he slowly turned Joe around and led him towards the tent which was no more than twenty feet away. Joe looked over his shoulder, grinned and waved. The remaining four giggled and waved back. They watched as Joe fell through the tent door laughing and Andy followed, scolding him like a little kid. Jon turned back shaking his head.

 “Aww it’s only because he cares,” noted Spencer, “You know what Joe’s like. Andy just worries...

"Why am I sharing with them? I supposed I had better go in there or he’ll be back out here warning me about the killer gnats.”  

“Hmm...” Jon nodded, “I wouldn’t mess with Andy!” Spencer tucked his notebook and pencil in his pocket as he stood up and yawned.

“I guess it is getting kind of cold and I am tired. I’ll see you guys in the morning then, yeah? Night.”

 “See ya Spence!” Brendon waved and Ryan smiled.

 “Good luck in there,” Jon called as he walked away, Spencer turned back and gave a thumbs up before disappearing into the tent. Ryan tried to ignore how close Brendon had suddenly moved to him and turned to talk to Jon.

 “How did he get like that anyway? He didn’t drink that much.” Jon smiled and put his hand into his pocket producing a second half empty bottle, “He drank most of that one.” Ryan laughed and glanced at Brendon again. Brendon looked back innocently. 

"What? I’m cold!”

 “Here you go,” Jon took off his jacket and threw it in Brendon’s direction, “I’m gunna go to sleep, looks like our parties disintegrated.” He held the half empty bottle in Ryan’s direction. “Here, it’ll keep you warm,” he grinned and Ryan took the bottle, “See you tomorrow.”

 “Night Jon!” Brendon said wiggling into his jacket.

 “We probably won’t be long, we’ll try not to wake you,” Ryan added and Jon turned off towards the tent. Ryan opened the whiskey and took a sip. He winced a little as the liquid burned the back of his throat and then took another before screwing the top back on. Again he noticed Brendon watching. “What is it now!?”

 “I was just wondering... why do you drink?” He tilted his head like a curious puppy. 

“What? I dunno... do I need a reason?”

 “Well yeah... I don’t think you actually like that do you? Is this still about her?” 

“Is what about her? What’s with the third degree?”

 “It is isn’t it! Otherwise you wouldn’t have known who I was talking about.” Brendon grabbed Ryan’s shoulders and spun him round to face him. Ryan felt his head whir slightly. He wasn’t used to drinking and that in combination with his tiny frame meant it went straight to his head. “Ry, I’m worried about you. Talk to me. Seriously,” for the first time all day Brendon’s face was deadly serious. Ryan looked at him startled, he didn’t know what to say.

 “Look Bren... I’m ok...” he mumbled. 

“Stop it! Stop lying. It’s me Ryan. You can tell me anything!” Ryan shook his head and took another drink. “Stop that as well! I’m trying to talk to you!” 

“Brendon! There’s nothing to fucking say! What is it you want me to tell you? That I can’t cope? That I’m falling apart? That I’m lonely and confused? That I’m fucking terrified by everything that’s going on with the band? That I’m insecure? What is it Bren because I can tell you all of that and all of it is fucking true but what is telling you achieving!? Fuck all!” Brendon looked startled and Ryan hung his head to hide the tears in his eyes. Brendon thought for a moment and then wrapped his arms around his friend,  

“Ry... I love you. I love you so much and I hate to see you like this. I wish I could make you feel better. I want you to be happy,” Ryan wiped his tears away stubbornly, "I didn't mean to upset you... but you can't keep pretending to be ok when you're clearly not. And drinking isn't gunna make things better. You of all people should know that. Look don't worry about it now, we'll talk when we get home? We'll sort this. You're gunna be fine." Brendon rubbed Ryan's shoulder encouragingly and he looked up at his friend through his tears. He looked different all of a sudden. He wasn't the hyperactive, overgrown kid he had been earlier. Suddenly he was a man, suddenly his brown eyes were deep with concern, the flickering fire light danced across his face. Both men realised they were staring and in an awkward attempt to get away from the new tension Brendon let go of Ryan and sank down on his knees closer to the fire. He grabbed a stick poking out and began to prod the fire which was beginning to die down. As he lifted his branch away from the flames a tiny piece of burning wood fell back catching his fingertip.

"Oww fuck!" He jumped backwards dropping the stick and holding onto his burnt finger.

"Oh! Are you ok? Here, let me see," Ryan took his friend's hand and examined the red mark which was already beginning to blister as Brendon sat back beside him, "Oooh it looks sore." He looked up to see Brendon studying his face, only this time he didn't feel annoyed by it, this time he didn't see his friend interfering. This time it was something different. He paused a moment before looking back at Brendon's hand. Cautiously he lifted it, avoiding eye contact with Brendon and gently kissed the burn. He paused again, this time waiting for a response but there was nothing, Brendon just continued to watch silently. Again his kissed Brendon's hand and then closed his lips around the red mark, carefully touching the blister with the tip of his tongue. Brendon winced a little but said nothing still even as Ryan took his finger into his mouth gently sucking the tip. As he took it away from his lips he finally looked up to meet Brendon's eyes again, "I love you," He whispered and, very slowly, almost as though he was waiting to be told where to go, he leant forwards to meet Brendon's closed lips. Brendon was unresponsive, frozen as Ryan pressed their lips together. Ryan began to pull away, mind buzzing with conflicting thoughts. But Brendon opened his mouth and pulled Ryan closer, he gasped slightly as his head whirred and his heart beat so fast he thought it might come out through his chest. Their tongues met sending a rush of electricity through them both and Ryan was sure that actual sparks must be dancing above them. His eyes flickered shut as Brendon explored with his tongue hungrily. It was almost as if they were frozen in time until after an eternity Brendon had to pull back gasping.  

“I... I ermm... I...” Brendon’s voice had become raspy and he stumbled over his words, “I need you.” He practically moaned the three words so that Ryan groaned in response, feeling a tightness in his jeans. Brendon lightly touched the nape of Ryan’s neck and he shivered as Brendon traced his burnt finger down the back of his t-shirt, following the hard bumps of Ryan’s spine, until his fingers rested in the small of his back, just under the hem of his t-shirt. Brendon’s hand was cold on his warm skin and he could feel the roughness of the blister on his fingertip as Brendon dipped it just below the waistline of his jeans making Ryan arch his back. He pulled his hands round and toyed with the button at the top of Ryan’s jeans. He slowly opened it and pulled down the zip. He chewed his lip as he took Ryan’s hand and pulled him up so they stood face to face, Brendon smiled reassuringly as he knelt down before his friend on the soft leaves and gently pulled his jeans down to his ankles. He could see Ryan was excited before he removed his boxers to reveal his hardening cock. Ryan pulled off his boots and kicked his jeans away and Brendon leant forward and ran his tongue along the length making Ryan shudder and stumble slightly.

“Sit down Ry, I don’t want you falling on me,” Brendon shrugged off Jon's jacket and draped it over the log then he tugged Ryan’s hand so that he sat back down. Ryan parted his legs so that Brendon could crawl between them and, this time, take him entirely into his mouth. Brendon’s mouth was so deliciously warm in contrast to the cold night air that Ryan struggled not to buck his hips and force himself in deeper as his cock became harder. His whole body began to ache with desire and he couldn't help moaning softly. He glanced down and watched Brendon and it was as though he was watching somebody else, this couldn't be happening to him. But it was happening and god did it feel incredible. Ryan had a suspicion that his friend had done this before, he quickly figured out just how and where to flicker his tongue to make Ryan growl in the back of his throat like a hungry animal. His skin was divine, Brendon wanted to cover every inch of it with his soft tongue, to consume every bead of sweat and trickle from the tip of Ryan's now solid cock but he needed more, he needed to be closer so he pulled back and sat on the log beside him. Ryan took a deep breath and whimpered as Brendon licked his swollen lips which curled up into a dirty grin.

"Please don't stop Brendon... I... fuck... please..." he was physically aching and desperate for release.

"Not yet Ry, I want more..." he paused wondering if he would regret this in the morning but decided that right now this was all he wanted and there was no going back, "I want to be inside you." Ryan felt as though his heart was going to stop, he tried to swallow but ended up choking. Brendon patted his back until he regained his composure, his eyes watering and then ran his hand across the jutting shoulder blades and notches of the thin boys back which were prominent even through Ryan's t-shirt, "So... is that a yes?" Brendon smiled and Ryan hesitated only for a moment before reaching to undo Brendon's jeans and carefully, as though he was terrified of harming him, pulled his semi-hard cock out. He ran his fingers along it gently and Brendon moaned in an almost exaggerated way to try and make Ryan feel more confident. Ryan looked at him wide-eyed and Brendon nodded encouragingly, "You know what to do... it's just like yours..." Brendon took Ryan's hand in his own and guided his curled fingers up and down the length of his shaft. Ryan bit on his bottom lip, his eyes rose from what his hand was doing up to look at Brendon's face, he was concentrating, his mouth slightly open, his breathing heavy. Ryan lowered his eyes again, he felt a whole mixture of emotions sitting there by fire light next to one of his best friends, naked from the waist down, with their erect penises at what would usually be an alarming proximity but somehow it excited him beyond anything he had felt before and he wanted to be closer.

"Brendon..." he whispered so quietly Brendon almost couldn't hear him, "I want you... to fuck me." Brendon felt a shiver down his spine as Ryan gazed at him through his big hazel eyes. He let go of Ryan's hand and pulled him in for a heavy kiss, the air around them was thick with fire smoke and lust, Brendon let his hands entwine in the back of Ryan's hair as he delved into his mouth. Ryan had never kissed anyone like this before, this was something new and special, it excited him beyond anything he had ever felt.

"Are you sure?" Brendon whispered.

"Absolutely," Ryan smiled, the flickering of the fire reflected in his eyes and Brendon felt his body ache in anticipation. Ryan slipped off the log onto the soft damp leaves on the ground, he twisted round on his knees to face Brendon and did that smile again, the one that made Brendon shudder. He rested his hands on the log and lifted his rear up slightly, signalling to Brendon exactly what he had in mind. And Brendon didn't need telling twice, with an excited giggle he kicked off his jeans and scurried round behind Ryan and rested his hands on his hips. He looked at the pale skin in front of him, admired the way he could see every notch of his spine, the way his skin was porcelain white and flawless, the little dimples at the bottom of his back and the perfect curve of his buttocks. Ryan was perfect. In every way. He looked round over his shoulder to see what Brendon was waiting for, his fringe, damp with sweat, flopped down over his eyes and Brendon couldn't help but sigh at how beautiful the boy was. He put one finger into his mouth and coated it in his spit. Ryan watched with hungry eyes as Brendon pulled it out and rested his other hand on one buttock, gently pushing it to one side. He pushed just the tip of his finger inside and Ryan bit his lip. He slowly pushed his finger further until the whole length disappeared. Ryan's eyes widened as Brendon pulled his finger back out, it felt so strange. But good strange. This time Brendon pushed two fingers in and spread them, slowly stretching Ryan who made a soft squeak.

"Ry, if this hurts, just say and I'll stop."

"No, please don't stop, carry on!" he turned his head again to look Brendon in the eye and assure him this was ok. Brendon smiled and pushed another finger in. Ryan gasped and Brendon giggled,

"You said carry on!" Ryan looked round and smiled back,

"Get on with it you fool." He cleared his throat and lowered his voice, "I want you inside me."

"Well... put it like that..." Brendon felt his cock ache and he couldn't say no. He spat into the palm of his hand and spread it over his length, trying not to get too drawn into his own pleasure and then lined himself up, "Last chance to tell me to get the fuck away from your ass." Ryan giggled and braced himself against the log. He didn't need to say anything for Brendon to know he had to do this. He very carefully and very slowly pushed himself in. Ryan gasped and he felt tears in the corners of his eyes as he felt Brendon fill him up. He had never imagined how odd this would feel, or how perfect. It was like Brendon had found where he belonged. His breathing was heavy as he stopped, waiting for Ryan to adjust, "Tell me when you're ready," he whispered.

"Goooo," moaned Ryan throwing his head back partly in pain and partly through his desperation. Brendon slowly pulled back almost completely out and then back in, Ryan whined and Brendon could hardly contain his excitement. He began to fall into a steady rhythm and Ryan began to feel more comfortable and more pleasure. Brendon slightly adjusted his angle with every stroke, quietly searching for something, something that would make Ryan moan like a slut. And it wasn't long before he found it. Surely enough Ryan moaned loudly as a wave of intense pleasure hit him. "Oh God. Bren do that again. Right... Oh... Right there... Yes..." Brendon began to pick up pace and began to pound into Ryan's prostate harder and harder. "Oh shit... Bren... I fucking love you... Oh my god... please... I need to come..." Brendon struggled not to let himself go as he listened to Ryan's desperate pleading. This was so perfect, he could see the tiny beads of sweat running down Ryan's bare back and feel his hips bucking, forcing himself harder against his cock. He had never felt so much pleasure in his life, he had never felt like he would explode like this and he had to hold on, he wanted to come with Ryan. He reached round and took Ryan's cock in his hand, gently rubbing his thumb over the tip so that Ryan gasped again and then wrapped his fist around Ryan's shaft to pump it in time with his own rocking. "Brendonnnn, I'm going to... oh...." Ryan cried and spilt into Brendon's hand, his arms gave way under him as his orgasm shook his body. Brendon moaned as he felt Ryan's muscles contracting around his cock and he came as well, spilling inside Ryan. There was silence for a moment and then Brendon slowly pulled out.

"Ry? Are you ok?" he looked at Ryan who had his face pressed against the ground, his eyes squeezed shut. There was a short pause before he opened his eyes.

"Everything's spinning..." he whispered. Brendon grinned,

"Really? Well I do have skills..." he giggled.

"No... I hit my head on the log..." Ryan replied and then couldn't help but laugh when he saw Brendon's disappointed pout, "You weren't bad though," he grinned as he propped himself up and watched Brendon gathering up his clothes and slowly pulling them back on before sitting down next to him.

"You not not getting dressed? You exhibitionist," he put his hand under Ryan's chin and turned his face to look at his forehead. "You've got a little bump!" We had better stay up for a bit and make sure you haven't got concussion!" Ryan nodded and leaned in to kiss Brendon softly.

"I love you. Never ever let anything spoil what we have. Ok?"

"I promise." Brendon smiled. "Just don't knock yourself out in future. I don't wanna kill you."

"Well next time we'll try somewhere a little more practical and comfortable, your bed or mine?" Brendon giggled and looked down at his bright shoes which lay on the ground beside them.

"Hey Ry... I haven't attracted any bears yet," Ryan scowled, "Anyway you were more likely to attract them with your moaning and..." Both men paused and looked at the tents just a few feet away and then back at each other.

"Oh shit... Bren... do you think they heard?"

"Ermmm... no?"

"Oh shit... this is a pretty big thing. I don't know if I'm really ready for the world to know."

"Hey, let's just take it one step at a time," he slid his arm around Ryan's shoulder and pulled him closer, "Seriously now, put some clothes on!" Ryan giggled again and poked his tongue out.

"I'm still recovering. You nearly killed me!"

"Oh stop milking it!" He pushed Ryan playfully and then jumped on top of him to tickle him. The two scrambled about play fighting for a while before stopping to kiss and look at each other. They both knew that they had started something special, neither knew where it was headed or whether it was likely to last but they did know it would be something unique, unlike anything either had experienced before.

Your secret's out.

2007-06-13T20:52:15Z

Title: Your secret's out
Rating: This story is rated NC-17.
Pairing:Brendon Urie/ Ryan Ross
Disclaimer: Hey guess what?? This isn't real! It didn't happen.

Ryan moaned lightly as he ran his hand over his aching cock. He bit down on his bottom lip as he got closer to his climax. He was hunched over the side of the hotel room bed, in the soft lamp light, guiltily pleasuring himself. He just couldn't help himself. In his head he imagined him, the one guy who made his heart flutter and his legs weak, stroking him, touching him, kissing him. He had never ever felt this way about anyone and certainly not another guy. He wanted him, so very desperately. But there was nothing he could do about it. It was wrong, he knew that, that's what he had been taught. He shouldn't have these sorts of feelings about another guy, especially not a friend. But he did and he couldn't get them out of his head. He gasped and shuddered as he ran his thumb over the head of his now throbbing cock and finally came into his hand with a soft cry,
"Brendon..." Shuddering with relief he sank back into the bed, desperately trying to push the guilt to the back of his mind, he entwined his sticky hand in the bed linen, wiping it clean. Then he opened his eyes and saw it. The line of light across the ceiling. He sat up quickly to see him. Brendon was stood there. Just inside the door and he was staring. "Brendon... I... did you... I thought...." Ryan's face drained to a ghostly white. What had he done? He begged to God that Brendon hadn't seen and/or heard, but his face told him he had. He was being punished for his disgusting feelings, he knew it. Now thanks to his dirty fantasies he was going to lose his best friend and he knew he deserved it, he knew what he was doing was wrong but he had carried on anyway. Neither man knew what to say. They simply stared at each other across the room. Ryan's face was lit up by the lamp beside him, the sweat still glistening on his now deathly white skin. And Brendon was in shadow. The tiny crack of light from the slightly open door made it impossible to see his face. What was he doing back? He had gone to a show with Jon. They weren't due back for over an hour. Brendon cleared his throat carefully and whispered,
"The show was rubbish... we left early..." and he gently pushed the door shut behind him. He quietly walked across the room, past Ryan to his own bed where he sat down. Ryan shut his eyes and prayed that when he turned around Brendon wouldn't be there, that it was his imagination, but when he opened them and turned his head, Brendon was very much there, sitting on his own bed staring at the wall.
"Brendon... I didn't know... I thought... I'm sorry..." he stuttered to get out some sort of explanation, anything to make things ok. Brendon shook his head. He had come in quietly thinking Ryan would be asleep and then seen him there and somehow he had been unable to move. Transfixed by his best friend masturbating in a dark hotel room. And then he had cried out, his name. It was the last thing he was expecting. Ryan was so... so straight. And quiet and nice and... this just wasn't right. He shook his head again.
"Ryan... why didn't you say anything? I would never have imagined you..." Ryan swallowed hard. He didn't know what to say. Right now he just wanted a tornado to rip into the room and carry him off. "How long have you... when did you start... having feelings for me?" He turned and looked Ryan in the eyes. Searching deep for answers. He needed to know what Ryan felt, what he wanted.
"...I..." Ryan tried to speak but his throat had dried out. He paused a moment before trying again, "I don't know exactly... a while... I know it's wrong. I shouldn't. I'm sorry. I just... you make me feel so... I've never felt like this before." Suddenly a rush of confessions were flooding from Ryan's soft feminine lips, his eyes welling up, "I can't stop thinking about you. When I see you my heart jumps and I want to be near you all the time... I want to do things with you that I've never wanted before." He stopped, trying to judge what Brendon was thinking. But he was giving nothing away, his dark eyes were still piercing him, searching. He was still shocked, he must be, Ryan stood up "Look I'll go... I'll go sleep in Spencer's room... I'll tell him you were sleep talking or something..."
"No... please don't go. I want to talk." Ryan sat back down again, oh God! He wanted to talk. About what? All Ryan wanted was to run away. To get out of the room. He could still smell his sweat, the heat of his orgasm lingering, unwanted. "It's not wrong. It's ok to be gay Ryan..."
"I'm not!" Ryan objected quickly.
"Ry... listen... it's me, it's Brendon, I'm your best friend. It's ok. I promise you that there is nothing wrong with having feelings for another guy." Ryan put his head in his hands. He wasn't gay was he? He suddenly felt Brendon's arm around him, comforting him. "Ryan you could have told me, you should have known." He looked up, what was he on about now, should have known what? "Have you ever seen me with a girl?" Ryan thought back, through the few years he had known him. From the first meeting in the street outside Spencer's house when he had noticed how Brendon's eyes lit up when he smiled. To on stage last night when he had watched Brendon pour every ounce of his passion into their performance, a passion which made him tremble with excitement.
"No. What's that got to do with anything?" He replied almost impatiently.
"Why do you think that is? Do you not think I've got enough girls after me? You've seen them chasing after our tour bus!" Both men chuckled slightly. "Ryan, I don't want a girlfriend, you don't see me with girls because... I'm gay Ryan." Ryan felt as though his heart had just burst through his chest. He was gay! Brendon liked guys. Not girls. "But Ry, you're my best friend... I can't... I don't..." This just wasn't right, all of a sudden everything was turned upside down. Brendon struggled with his thoughts. Sure Ryan was gorgeous, Brendon had quite often admired his tight ass or his melting eyes but he had never thought of him as anything but a friend. Because Ryan was straight! But suddenly he was seeing something new. The way his soft hair flopped into his face, his vulnerable eyes, his soft skin, his red, swollen lips... suddenly Brendon wasn't looking at his best friend, he was looking at a potential partner. It was like being with a different person. He leant over and kissed him on the cheek, lingering just a little longer than he would normally. "Look... a lot's just happened... and it's kinda hard to think right now. You know I love you so much, ok? Let's get some sleep and we'll talk properly in the morning when everything's sorted in our heads." With that he got up and went back to his own bed. He started unbuttoning his shirt and paused. Suddenly he didn't want to change infront of Ryan. It felt weird. But Ryan had got into his bed, the sheets pulled up to his neck and his back to Brendon. Brendon noticed the slightly damp stains on the sheets where Ryan had cleaned his hand, he swallowed hard and squeezed his eyes shut trying not to think about it.

*************************************************************

Ryan rolled over and glanced towards Brendon's bed. He couldnt see his face. He was laying on his back staring up at the ceiling. He wondered if he was asleep. In his own bed he had so many thoughts buzzing in his head he just couldn't rest. Brendon too was wide awake. This is ridiculous, he told himself he knew Ryan was awake too by his fidgeting. After what seemed another lifetime he whispered,
"Ry? Are you awake?" There was a pause.
"...Yeah." Then nothing. More silence. The two of them waited, frozen, wondering who should speak first, what they should say. Ryan lifted his head slowly to look at Brendon, waiting for the go ahead sign. Brendon shuffled over until his body hit the wall and gently patted the bed next to him. Ryan slid out of his and eased himself in next to his friend. The bed wasn't huge and their bodies were dangerously close. He could feel Brendon's hot breath on his neck. Both men's breathing was heavy, neither knew what to say or do. Ryan felt intensely aroused by their closeness, the heat of his crush's body, the sound of his breathing, his heartbeat. Brendon lifted his hand, pausing, unsure and gently brushed Ryan's fringe out of his eyes. He rested on the taller man's cheek, just above his own. The tension in the air was thick, like a suffocating fog. And then Brendon broke the ice. He made the first move. He leant in and kissed Ryan's soft lips. Just a gentle kiss at first. Then going back for more this time more certainly. Ryan parted his lips willingly to allow Brendon's tongue to slip in, softly, curiously. They were like young teenagers again. Both hesitant, inexperienced, not sure what to do.
"Brendon, I've wanted to be with you for so long." Ryan whispered huskily, "I want to touch you, to hold you close to me, to be a part of you..." Brendon shuddered, nobody had ever spoken to him like that before, in a tone heavily laced with desire. His voice so thick and lustful. He opened his mouth to reply to say something sensible, this was ridiculous, he had to stop it but all that came out was a heavy moan,
"Oh... Ry..." As he shifted to get closer he felt Ryan's erection press against his stomach, this was no joke, Ryan wanted him. His own cock was hardening with their fumbled kisses and erotic moans. He felt Ryan's hand slide up under the tshirt he was wearing. He gently ran his fingers over Brendon's nipples. He couldn't believe this was actually happening. Everything he had dreamed of. It was so unreal and so exciting it almost made his mouth water.Brendon reached round to stroke Ryan's back, to feel his soft skin, his sharp shoulder blades jutting out, the sensitive area right at the bottom of his spine which, when touched, made Ryan gasp and jolt forwards slightly. As he pulled his hand back round Ryan grabbed his wrist and pushed it up to his chest over his hammering heart,
"Can you feel that? You do that to me. Everytime you get a little bit too close. Everytime you laugh. Everytime you take off your shirt. Only you make it do that." Brendon stared back intently, his eyes not blinking, overwhelmed by the intensity of Ryan's words, unsure how to answer, instead he leant in for another hungry kiss.
Ryan tilted his head back to let him kiss his pale neck, his adam's apple, Brendon kissed and sucked and gently bit at him, trying to cover all the skin. Nothing was to go untouched. He tugged at the collar of Ryan's t-shirt, trying to tell him he wanted it off without removing his lips to say it. Ryan sat up pulled it off and was back before Brendon had realised. He smirked and nuzzled the soft part between Ryan's collarbones before removing his own shirt. Just left in their cotton boxers they both paused. They had crossed the line. There was no going back now. Just being friends was out of the question. They had turned it into something more. Ryan gently pushed Brendon until he rolled onto his back and quickly climbed over him. He left a soft trail of kisses down from his mouth, pausing to tease both nipples and his navel. Then sliding down the trail of dark hair before pausing at the cotton waistband to look up at Brendon. He had been moaning and sighing quietly, his hands tangled in Ryan's hair, his erection becoming stronger and more painful. His body was begging for relief. He nodded at Ryan, his eyes shining in that way Ryan adored. Without a second thought he tugged the boxers down and froze.
This was it. What he had been dreaming of. He had never seen another man's erect cock. Not in real life anyway, and certainly not up close. Never had he wanted to touch something more. He let go of the bed sheets he was clutching and softly ran his fingers along Brendon's shaft making him buck his hips upwards. He breathed in sharply, preparing himself, and then leaned in to take Brendon in his mouth. His lips slipping over slowly. His tongue tasting the salty dampness. He moved up again, his tongue slipping around, exploring. Brendon grabbed at the sheets below him and tried to force his hips to stop bucking. He didn't want to choke Ryan and he certainly didn't want this to be over yet. Ryan came back up to Brendon's face, his eye's glistening, his hair knotted and sweaty.
"Brendon? Can you... I want... I want to feel you in me." he whispered huskily, his lips were slightly tacky from Brendon's leaking cock.
"Ry... I don't know. I'm not sure... It's a big step... you can't rush into this. I don't want to hurt you."
"Please. It's all I want." He moved forwards so that his lips were half an inch from Brendons ear. "I want to feel you hard inside me, pushing into me, stretching my tight muscles..." Ryan trailed off and Brendon groaned.
"Oh god... Ryan..." His mind was still saying it was a bad idea but his aching body was screaming out that it was exactly what he needed. He rolled over onto his side, Ryan moved over onto his back and Brendon moved over above him. Ryan looked up, he was trembling, his body throbbing with anticipation. "If you're sure Ry." Ryan didn't need to answer, his face said it all. Brendon shuffled down and pulled off Ryan's boxers his erection jumped out, freed at last. Brendon spat into his hand and slipped his fingers between his friends pale, thin thighs to find his entrance. He slipped in one finger easily, Ryan may have been a virgin but he had been experimenting by himself a lot further than what Brendon had witnessed earlier. The second finger caused Ryan to flinch a little and Brendon paused before scissoring his fingers, a little at first and then wider. Ryan gasped as Brendon pushed in a third finger. This felt so wrong but so right at the same time. As Brendon felt Ryan relax he pulled his hand out. He had to get inside before he came from the sight of Ryan lying beneath him, exposed and vulnerable. All of a sudden he longed to fuck his best friend, as though he had always wanted him, this felt so right. Brendon spat on his hand and glided it quickly over his cock before positioning himself. His tip brushed Ryan's entrance and he looked deep into Ryan's eyes. He wanted to be sure he was doing the right thing by Ryan.
"If you want me to stop, or it hurts too much or anything, tell me Ry. I won't do anything you don't want. It will hurt a little but I'll be as gentle as I can. No pain... no gain." Ryan smiled and nodded. This was exactly why he loved Brendon, he was so kind and loving and gentle with him and always found something funny to say in the most awkward situations. Brendon pushed in slightly and Ryan squealed. He felt a horrible burning pain as Brendon eased himself in a little at a time and then froze. Ryan could feel his newly appointed lover's hard cock deep inside him and he moaned,
"Fuck me Brendon. Please just fuck me." This was all he had wanted for what seemed an eternity. Brendon didn't reply but responded by pulling out almost to the tip and then slipping back in very slowly. Ryan's muscles were so tight and warm around him and it took all his concentration not to come right then. He pulled out again and began to find a steady rhythm. Ryan pushed his hips up. Trying to find some friction on his own cock which so far had been neglected. It brushed hard against Brendon's stomacha and his inexperience let him down as suddenly he found himself dangerously close to orgasm. "Bren.. I...I'm gunna come..."
"Hang on... I'm not done..." Brendon wanted to do this properly. He altered his angle expertly and hit Ryan's prostate so that he screamed. He smiled, that was what he had wanted to hear. He slammed the sensitive spot as hard as he could manage 1...2...3 times and Ryan came hard, spilling onto both men's stomachs.
"Brendon!" Again he screamed his friends name. But this time there was nothing to hide. This time it was meant to be. Brendon released his own load inside Ryan gently riding out their orgasms before pulling out and leaning down to kiss Ryan's open, gasping mouth. His eyes were shut and his cheeks flushed a deep shade of crimson. "Brendon... I love you..." He whispered. Brendon smiled,
"Ryan. I think I love you too." He wrapped his arms around Ryan and closed his own eyes. A grin appeared across Ryan's face. This was everything he had dreamed of. It was coming true and he was so fucking happy.